Our first night in London and we suffered the absolute ignominy of being thrown out of the Ritz bar for not having 'proper' shoes on. I was wearing my new metallic Golden Goose shoes. You pay an arm and a leg for these to look like you've been wearing them for 25 years while you've cleaned chimney's for a living - we're talking seriously distressed. Nigel was even more so when he realised they weren't joking and we really did have to leave. "But these cost 2 'undred pand" - he spluttered in his best Cockney accent. Unfortunately for us the Ritz butler didn't give a raspberry tart.
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